My Crazy Love Life - Part 1 (The Bi-sexual Me)

I'm going to take it back to the beginning. I was not always gay. I was very straight, up till about my freshman year in high school. I was probably boy crazy, my friends would say. I kissed a girl for the first time in my freshman year in high school, we were drunk and it was a dare (Typical 1st lesbian experience). However at this point I was already curious about girls. I still dated guys & girls throughout high school. I met the first girl that ever meant something more to me, well more than just a hookup in 10Th grade. She was my first real lesbian experience, she was already a lesbian & she taught me lots of things. But most of all she showed me it was OK to care for or to love a girl (Which is something, I never acknowledged before). I didn't have to be embarrassed about what I was feeling or ashamed. She was my first heart break-from a girl as well. Love emh & leave emh right? It was never her intention to hurt me, but it happened.

While dating her I came out to my parents, My dad was understanding, because he knew I dated guys, & this was just a phase. My mom was devastated, crying & hurt that I could be bi-sexual, she could not grasp me being gay. (Sorry mom & dad, still gay). Although neither could I really back then. But I have always been passionate about what I want. And that was something I wanted for myself, to make my own sexual choices not what the world wanted to choose for me.

Then I met a guy I fell for in the beginning of my junior year of high school, thought he was the one, we even got out names tattooed across our backs. I got his & he got mine. He was the perfect guy in my eyes. Handsome, (well to me he was), He was a complete gentleman, opened doors for me, greeted my parents by MR. & MRS. (last name). We, got along great, we spent all of our time together. He was older than me buy quite a few years, & at this point in my life I was being home schooled, So we spent alot of time together. We loved each other, he truly was my first love. I still have a special place for him in my heart today. (At this point my parents are jumping for joy I'm sure.)

Then things started to get ugly about 1 1/2 years into our relationship, he was using drugs & became very jealous & controlling. I went back to high school for my senior year. It killed him, that I was going to be around other guys. Long story short, his drug abuse became so over-powering that it ruined our relationship. We lasted a total of about 3 and a half years. I still have so much love for him today, he is actually still very close to my family. His cousin married my cousin.

So as I'm sure your thinking, well after that battle, what bi-sexual wouldn't swing back to the other side. But to be honest at this point in my life, I decided that was it with guys. I would never love another guy the way I loved him, & I was much more into girls at this point anyways. So that's when it all started to be girls only. Since I was about 18, going on 19, I only dated women. But let me just assure you, girls are no less drama then guys. All relationships are work.

Make sure to check out my next blog, my crazy love life - Part 2 (The Lesbian Me) Hope you enjoyed today's dose of Vixxx